45 Comments
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Kristin K Wilde Giuliani's avatar

Well, clearly you articulated something in a way I desperately needed because I am a puddle right now. Thank you for putting into words the exhaustion of trying to grow in the accidental cracks of sunlight in a system designed to suffocate.

Denise Servais's avatar

I’m sorry you’re having to deal with this too. It’s a lot. Thank you for reading and for sharing how it hit you. I hope things ease up for you soon.

Jen Ratcliffe ✍️🚣‍♀️'s avatar

All too familiar. I have to agree - it's time to change the system 💪

Denise Servais's avatar

Yes, indeed! Thank you for reading it.

Rosetta McKinnon's avatar

They won't, that's too easy for them.

The Death Whisperer's avatar

What a beautifully articulated and deeply personal experience with our very broken healthcare system. As a hospice RN and end of life Doula, many of my patients frequently complain that they became frustrated with the system and the challenges of navigating it and were very relieved when they ended up in my care with strong advocacy. I learned this strong advocacy through many system failures and issues as I navigated leukemia diagnosis and treatment. We need to take our power back and demand change. ♥️

Denise Servais's avatar

Thanks for your response. This means a lot coming from someone who has been on both sides. I appreciate the work you do.

Adaris's avatar

Hola Beautiful, “The plan lived in my nervous system instead of their spreadsheet.” That line alone says everything. Thank you for naming this.

Denise Servais's avatar

Thank you for taking the time to read this!

Chris B. Writes's avatar

Wow Denise, you explained this perfectly.

Denise Servais's avatar

Thanks Chris for reading it!

Susan J Hilger's avatar

So much truth here, thanks for saying this

Denise Servais's avatar

Thanks for taking the time to read it!

Susan J Hilger's avatar

I’d like to share it when I get home, I have early morning medical things to deal with, oh the irony

Denise Servais's avatar

Thanks Susan for taking the time to read this.

Aaliya's avatar

This really hits home. I completely agree. It’s like these systems are built to wear us down. Your experience with the pharmacy is all too familiar. It’s time for change.

Denise Servais's avatar

That’s exactly how it feels. Thanks for reading!

Aaliya's avatar

Bless you keep shining and writing ♥️

Denise Servais's avatar

Thank you, you too!

For Everyone's avatar

I am writing this while chewing breakfast, I have been taking care of my sick disabled daughter for 32 years, she now has stage 4 liver failure rejected for transplant. My parents made no future plans in case of illness, I have been taking care of my mother for the last year and a half, and all the house crap by myself. I am there for both of them 24/7. I do have 5 sisters, I am not even allowed to discuss whatever calamities I faced the day of conversation. Getting useful help from the government doubtful I can’t even get it from sisters 2 of which live in same town, 2 an hour away. It’s fine I will keep doing what has to be done to help my mother. My daughter, she and my pets of course are the loves of my life I will always do anything for them. Sorry it was a rant but I was going to write it here or to Echo the AI use. Welcome to the brave new world.

Denise Servais's avatar

No need to apologize! That’s not a rant. This is a life that’s carrying an awful lot. I’m sorry you’re holding this much on your own. Take care.

Hannah Torkelson's avatar

I so appreciate your stance here! You've left me feeling empowered to do something about it.

Denise Servais's avatar

That makes me happy! Thanks for reading!

Stephanie Kumar's avatar

I hear you mama! We went through the SPED and IEP process two years ago.. 🫠

Denise Servais's avatar

Thanks for taking the time to read it!

Jennifer L.W. Fink's avatar

I just shared w my sister, who was posting yesterday about how her work HR dept requires a letter signed by her dr for a certain accommodation every six months, but the health insurance provided by her company only covers 1 provider visit a yr and the dr won't sign it without an appt.

Denise Servais's avatar

That’s exactly what I’m talking about. Systems that require proof you’re still human every six months, while making it almost impossible to get the proof. It shouldn’t take this much effort just to maintain basic accommodations.

Kelly - Mothers never give up's avatar

These are super insightful perspectives and you did such a great job articulating them! Thank you for sharing this, Denise!

Denise Servais's avatar

I appreciate that Kelly. It’s not easy to write about broken systems without sounding bitter. I’m trying to stay honest and useful. Thanks for reading!

Rosetta McKinnon's avatar

Healthcare, family services, emergency assistance, food stamps, etc., all are a joke. SMH

Rosetta McKinnon's avatar

You hit the system on the head. Reasons why Eye don't like having to deal with them. Don't like the frustration, anger, anxiety and stress it causes. Only to be denied and to them your so called reasons doesn't fit there guidelines to help you. So, move forward and put distance between me and them. It's exhausting...😮‍💨😒🤪🤨

Denise Servais's avatar

A lot of people feel that, hope, frustration, denial, and repeat. It takes a toll. I’m sorry you’ve had to deal with that.

Hattie Monday's avatar

It does indeed sound oddly specific, in a way I recognise 100%. This has really struck a chord with me, will reply later when my brain has organised some thoughts.

Hattie Monday's avatar

God another example. AGES ago I got a marketing text from Natwest telling me I was spending loads on interest on my overdraft, and there were a number of ways they could help.

I know, I know, but I decided to phone them up and see if they meant it. Cue a MASSIVE drama as a customer service rep paid no attention whatsoever to anything I said, instead writing down that I was threatening to refuse to pay any more interest on my account.

The other thing they kept doing was ARE YOU STRUGGLING TO PAY YOUR BILLS? TALK TO OUR CUSTOMER SUPPORT TEAM. I was like 'oh ffs do you understand that you contacted me about interest rates on my overdraft?'

Denise Servais's avatar

That's a perfect example. That’s the part that makes you feel slightly unhinged, right? They contact you, then act like you’ve created the issue. Ugh!

Rosetta McKinnon's avatar

Let's not discuss these banking systems LOL! Wooobooyyeee!! LOL

Hattie Monday's avatar

When I had my eldest daughter I was ‘induced’ and then chucked on a ward for 6 days, they didn’t believe me when I said my waters had broken. My epidural didn’t work and then the anesthetist disappeared for hours. Eventually because I had to have another epidural I also had to have a forceps delivery. My daughter had become ill and spent 5 days in NICU.

Fortunately there were no long term complications (that we’re aware of) but all that trauma that was totally avoidable.

I behaved and did what the system told me; and this is how they repaid me.

Denise Servais's avatar

I’m sorry that happened. Being dismissed during something that vulnerable leaves a mark. I’m glad your daughter is okay, but that doesn’t erase what you went through.

Lynn J. Broderick's avatar

I felt your frustration in every word. The way you wrote it—so direct and poetic—kept me reading to the end. I’m really sorry this is happening. It’s so unfair.

Denise Servais's avatar

Thanks Lynn for reading it!